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This is my favourite, most powerful multiplayer EDH deck - designed to win group games entirely at once, often without warning, yet is still interactable enough that my friends/opponents actually enjoy going up against it!

It relies on three things: Ramp, Tokens, and Pumps.

Named after a frequent warning passed between opponents.

Principles:

Hazezon Brings The Beer But Can't Join The Party

Unlike most other generals, Hazezon craves the grave. As long as Hazezon dies sometime between when he enters play and when the delayed trigger resolves, the Sand Warrior tokens will not be threatened by his 'leaves-play' effect. This deck employs the best at-will sacrifice outlets to make sure that happens; chosen not only to kill Hazezon, but to get the most value whenever an opponent inevitably wipes the board out of fear. In addition, Hazezon can be cast, sacrificed, and recast repeatedly to multiply his delayed triggers before the next turn.

Exponential Pumps

Finite pumps are not enough. This deck relies on pumps that will win the game in one decisive attack. Anthems are a trap - they're too slow, are more easily removed and telegraph my threat level. Why pump for +1 when I can pump for +10? +20? With exponential pumps, this deck can easily deal hundreds if not thousands points of damage, often after beginning the turn with zero board presence (other than land).

Every Land Counts

Because each additional land means another Sand Warrior token, which in turn means another degree of exponential pump, this deck never curves out. There is no such thing as too many lands or too much mana. The more land ramp is cast the more powerful Hazezon's triggers become and age-counters are no longer a problem. Artifact ramp is avoided since it is the second easiest permanent to remove after creatures.

No Lightning Rods

No one wants to waste spot removal on a token, so these cards tend to rot in the hands of opponents. This wastes their card draws, but this also means they'll always have an answer once a lone threat ever pops up (or even worse, if I don't have a sac outlet for Hazezon). So this deck specifically avoids any creature cards that require remaining on the field to generate value.

Who Needs Removal?

My opponents, that's who. Hazezon is so fast and so threatening it rarely needs removal - my opponents will do it for me. An explosion of tokens and the looming threat of an exponential pump will force most opponents to reluctantly cast their board wipes, taking out any threats opposing me as well. Once the board is wiped clean, Hazezon will bounce back faster than its competition.

Haste Enablers

I don’t particularly mind when board wipes happen, but why give my opponents the choice? Relying on my troops' summoning sickness, my opponents plan on and expect a full round to respond to my threats, thinking they can safely leave themselves open and indulge in building their offense. As long as I keep my haste enablers in hand (I never cast them early), this flawed logic is often their undoing.

Extra Turn - Final Turn!

If Hazezon is going to win, it's going to win the entire table all at once - so why not go all-in? Win or die! It either warps the game ahead to when the sand warriors arrive, or it gives my army pseudo-haste plus an extra draw with all my lands untapped. Should be everything I need! And it'll keep things exciting for the entire table, because either way SOMETHING is going to happen (meanwhile the blue playing is still umm'ing and ahh'ing his way through his sixth Time Stretch lulling everyone into a coma).

Suggestions

Updates Add

  • Added Shamanic Revelation, cutting Toski, Bearer of Secrets. Toski just didn't work out - too slow, too easy to block, awkward timing; all weaknesses I'd guessed going in, but have now confirmed. Instead of putting Slate of Ancestry back in, I'm trying out Shamanic Revelation. The Ferocious aspect is wasted on me, and it doesn't interact with Genesis Wave and Warp World like Slab does, but it is safe from artifact removal, doesn't telegraph, and is the most mana efficient option to play the turn my sand tokens arrive. I might not be able to repeat it like I can with Slab, but one time should be all I need.

  • Added back in Rampant Growth, cutting Cultivate. I loved my promo Cultivate, but CMC2 ramp is just too powerful. The more I play-test, the more the difference is critical.

Comments

Date added 8 years
Last updated 4 weeks
Legality

This deck is Commander / EDH legal.

Rarity (main - side)

18 - 0 Mythic Rares

52 - 0 Rares

14 - 0 Uncommons

8 - 0 Commons

Cards 100
Avg. CMC 3.65
Tokens 1/1 RGW Token Creature Sand Warrior, Construct 0/0 C, Copy Clone, Insect 1/1 G, Plant 0/1 G, Soldier 1/1 W, Zombie 2/2 B
Folders edh, haz, Cool Decks to Try, Group game decks, Ideas, Casual, Uncategorized
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