Incoherent Noises at Shady Oaks Retirement Home

Commander / EDH Cruel Control Discard Mono-Black Pox Stax Theme/Gimmick

CMGraves

LifeAlert (18)

• 1x Ashen-Skin Zubera
• 1x Call to the Netherworld
• 1x Deathknell Kami
• 1x Dread Wanderer
• 1x Elixir of Immortality
• 1x Entomber Exarch
• 1x Hell's Caretaker
• 1x Nihilistic Glee
• 1x Oversold Cemetery
• 1x Reassembling Skeleton
• 1x Sanitarium Skeleton
• 1x Shadow of the Grave
• 1x Shirei, Shizo's Caretaker
• 1x Stitch Together
• 1x Supernatural Stamina
• 1x Tenacious Dead
• 1x Thief of Hope
• 1x Tortured Existence

Shuffleboard (7)

• 1x Contamination
• 1x Descent into Madness
• 1x Desolation
• 1x Gibbering Descent
• 1x Oppression
• 1x Pox
• 1x Smallpox

Bingo (3)

• 1x Altar of Dementia
• 1x Mindcrank
• 1x Trepanation Blade

MatlockMarathon (10)

• 1x Dash Hopes
• 1x Delirium Skeins
• 1x Distress
• 1x Liliana, Heretical Healer  ^Flip
• 1x Lost Hours
• 1x Mind Slash
• 1x Mindslicer
• 1x Mindwarper
• 1x Struggle for Sanity
• 1x Wrench Mind

Retirement (9)

• 1x Drain Life
• 1x Fatal Push
• 1x Grave Pact
• 1x Living Death
• 1x Megrim
• 1x Plagued Rusalka
• 1x Shrieking Affliction
• 1x Torment of Hailfire
• 1x Tragic Slip

Land (35)

• 1x Cascading Cataracts
• 1x Geier Reach Sanitarium
• 1x Nykthos, Shrine to Nyx
• 32x Swamp

401K (3)

• 1x Deathgreeter
• 1x Profane Memento
• 1x Suffer the Past

Commander (1)

SocialSecurity (9)

• 1x Asylum Visitor
• 1x Corrupted Grafstone
• 1x Crypt Ghast
• 1x Everflowing Chalice
• 1x Feldon's Cane
• 1x It That Betrays
• 1x Magus of the Coffers
• 1x Sol Ring
• 1x Vessel of Endless Rest

Residents (4)

• 1x Disowned Ancestor
• 1x Mortician Beetle
• 1x Tormented Soul
• 1x Uncle Istvan

ShuffleBoard (1)

• 1x Death Cloud

---

Sideboard

Other (11)

• 1x Disciple of the Vault
• 1x Festering Mummy
• 1x Gate to the Afterlife
• 1x Ghost-Lit Stalker
• 1x Grimoire of the Dead
• 1x Illness in the Ranks
• 1x Lingering Death
• 1x Mind Stone
• 1x Scepter of Fugue
• 1x Thought Prison
• 1x Virulent Plague

MatlockMarathon (2)

• 1x Brain Maggot
• 1x Cloak of Confusion

SocialSecurity (1)

• 1x Initiates of the Ebon Hand

LifeAlert (1)

• 1x Call the Bloodline

---

This deck is all about getting old, sick and crazy. I started putting it together after I saw Chainer, Dementia Master and started looking for any cards related to a pyschosis break. Running out of options in symbol:black, I added sickness. Turns out, most of the cards related to driving opponents hellbent. This deck has no plan other than bipolar - there is a tutor through transmute but otherwise the deck should be played as its name implies. The more it's played without a plan, the funner it is and the more opponents are driven crazy. In terms of competitiveness, I give it a 6 out of 10, although with the right cards in the opening hand, it can gain quick control of the game. Watch your opponents go mad as you durdle on turn three with Reassembling Skeleton and Contamination on the field.

This deck should be played with one the objective of driving opponents insane. I consider it a win if you make an opponent scoop - preferably in anger, disgust etc.

I need to find some instant speed sack outlets and discard outlets that fit the theme.

Custom Categories

Turns out, that is actually a really crappy Stax deck in that it generally hurts me as much as it hurts my opponents. The general flow of events, even without a plan, usually results in either making it painful if not impossible to cast spells or causing everyone to top deck spells. I decided to make some custom categories that fit the theme of the deck and the flow of events.

First off in his own category is Chainer, Dementia Master proud owner of Shady Oaks.

1. Shuffleboard contains Stax-like cards which causes everyone, myself included, to durdle or play shuffleboard.

2. Matlock Marathon contains cards that end up driving everyone hellbent. Like shuffleboard, everyone starts to durdle, trying to top deck something they need

3. Social Security and 401K once the durdling hits full swing I have to rely on my Social Security Checks which allow me to cast spells with fewer resources, give me extra cards or put everything back in my library and my 401K to get some life back.

4. Sometimes when playing Shuffleboard, you fall down and need your Life Alert to get back on your feet.

5. Retirement are all cards which help me "retire" opponents life and/or creatures

6. Bingo puts cards in graveyards for Chainer to use

7. Finishing up is Residents

Date added	7 years
Last updated	6 years
Exclude colors	WURG
Legality	This deck is Commander / EDH legal.
Rarity (main - side)	2 - 1 Mythic Rares 28 - 1 Rares 20 - 8 Uncommons 18 - 5 Commons
Cards	100
Avg. CMC	2.58
Tokens	Emblem Liliana, Defiant Necromancer, Vampire Knight 1/1 B, Zombie 2/2 B
Folders	Decks I'd like to try