Gilbert Gottfrieds Longest Joke (Mardu Humans)

Modern* Aristocrats Discard Humans Midrange RBW (Mardu) Sacrifice

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Creature (33)

• 3x Bloodsoaked Champion
• 4x Champion of the Parish
• 3x Doomed Traveler
• 3x Falkenrath Aristocrat
• 2x Fireblade Artist
• 4x Fleshtaker
• 2x Judith, the Scourge Diva
• 4x Kitesail Freebooter
• 4x Thalia's Lieutenant
• 2x Thalia, Guardian of Thraben
• 2x Tithe Taker

Land (19)

• 2x Arid Mesa
• 2x Blood Crypt
• 2x Bloodstained Mire
• 3x Cavern of Souls
• 2x Godless Shrine
• 2x Marsh Flats
• 1x Mountain
• 1x Plains
• 2x Sacred Foundry
• 1x Silent Clearing
• 1x Swamp

Instant (4)

• 2x Lightning Bolt
• 2x Village Rites

Artifact (4)

• 4x Aether Vial

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Sideboard

Instant (3)

• 1x Hide / Seek
• 2x Vanishing Verse

Sorcery (3)

• 3x Rip Apart

Enchantment (3)

• 2x Rest in Peace
• 1x Stony Silence

Creature (4)

• 2x Ethersworn Canonist
• 2x Kambal, Consul of Allocation

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Maybeboard

Creature (21)

• 1x Adeline, Resplendent Cathar
• 2x Alesha, Who Smiles at Death
• 1x Ash Zealot
• 2x Cartel Aristocrat
• 1x Chaplain of Alms  ^Flip
• 2x General Kudro of Drannith
• 1x Intrepid Adversary
• 1x Kytheon, Hero of Akros  ^Flip
• 1x Liliana, Heretical Healer  ^Flip
• 1x Morbid Opportunist
• 1x Priest of Forgotten Gods
• 1x Robber of the Rich
• 1x Sin Collector
• 1x Subira, Tulzidi Caravanner
• 1x Swiftblade Vindicator
• 1x Tajic, Legion's Edge
• 2x Zulaport Cutthroat

Sorcery (8)

• 1x Crumble to Dust
• 1x Damn
• 1x Dreadbore
• 1x Gather the Townsfolk
• 1x Proclamation of Rebirth
• 1x Slaughter Games
• 1x Sunset Revelry
• 1x Vindicate

Instant (3)

• 1x Boros Charm
• 1x Dire Tactics
• 1x Kolaghan's Command

Artifact (1)

• 1x Pyre of Heroes

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Inspired by Gilbert Gottfried, has this reference been made before?

probably.

Heres the plan:

Get Aether Vial out, swarm opponent with creatures that have Leave-The-Battlefield/Dying Triggers, set Falkenrath Aristocrat and swing endlessly with an indestructible, constantly growing threat to finish out the game. Theres some other synergies going on here ill break down with my creature choices:

-Bloodsoaked Champion, Doomed Traveler, are our primary Sac targets. Doomed Traveler because they leave a token behind to sacrifice again, and Bloodsoaked because his Raid ability allows him to return almost immediately after being sac'd to Falkenrath or Fleshtaker

which brings us to...

-Falkenrath Aristocrat. I love this card for some strange reason and it was the original Aristocrats deck during GTC standard that likely did that for me, due to its unique synergies with humans.

-Thalia's Lieutenant and Zulaport Cutthroat are two nice synergistic humans 2 drops that can come in and make a difference immediately. Since theyre more of flavor additions to this list, we're keeping them at 2 each. still keeping Tithe Taker but i dont know why. maybe ill move it to SB.

-Bone Shards and Village Rites. Bone Shards is probably in my top 5 favorite cards from MH2, but Im not sure its the best removal here. It fits the theme yes, but im still not sold that its better in this deck than Lightning Bolt or Path to Exile could be. I think its better in a reanimator or discard-heavy deck than a sacrifice deck, so maybe ill keep it but just use less copies. Still unsure. Village Rites is nice. real nice. I was stoked to see it get special treatment in Strixhaven's mystical archives. Rites is ultimately our payoff here, and keeps our hand fresh if we arent drawing the sac outlets we need (Such as Falkenrath or Fleshtaker)

Date added	3 years
Last updated	2 years
Legality	This deck is Modern legal.
Rarity (main - side)	5 - 0 Mythic Rares 33 - 10 Rares 14 - 3 Uncommons 5 - 0 Commons
Cards	60
Avg. CMC	1.76
Tokens	Spirit 1/1 W, Spirit 1/1 WB
Folders	Vial Tribals