"If Yawgmoth meant Squee's immortality as a curse, no one ever told Squee" - Karn

Squee was a goblin cabin-hand on the Skyship Weatherlight. He is known for his foul cooking, love of eating bugs, and manner of speaking.

During the first Phyrexian Invasion, Squee was captured by the Phyrexians, and granted immortality by Yawgmoth, so that he might be killed repeatedly by Ertai and Crovax.

This deck represents the various tortures Squee may have been faced with, and his constantly returning to life just to be killed again. And again. And again...

For you are Crovax, with your little toy Squee in a big vault of Fun Things To Torture Squee. And the others in the game of course.

Please note: If you're looking for a powerful, Power 10 style deck, I don't know how you got here. This is simply a theme/gimmick deck that was pretty amusing to assemble on this site. Will I build it? Probably, I'm a sucker for decks that seem fun to play, no matter the power level. I'm not playing to win, I'm playing to have fun. Major work in progress for this theme, as it mostly relies on killing Squee to do things, or doing a lot of damage to everything to do things, such as Coalhauler Swine and Toralf. I am pretty sure this will be a low power deck, but the concept seems like it could be a lot of fun.

Suggestions

Updates Add

Well, I've used this deck a few times. The more I play it, the more and more I like it.

The first couple of games, people ignored Squee, thinking he was harmless and a useless Commander. They were the first to be brutalized by our immortal goblin.

Players have actually tried to destroy, exile, steal, bounce, enchant, and so much more to our favourite little cabin boy...just to have him be sacrificed to punish them for DARING to harm Squee...just to have him come back again. Players have tried for multiple games to target him! One I even allowed to Terminate him and they were all excited, thinking Squee was gone. Not sure how they got that idea. I cast him from the graveyard, so another used Path to Exile! I effective got a land for 1RR! They were confused when I simply cast him out of exile and brought him back.

Now players are just confused. They have kill spells and could remove the artifacts and enchantments I use, but in comparison with the other players, is it really worth it?

I've been finding this deck to be great fun. I've had to use proxies for some cards as I was too lazy to hunt them down, but I've been slowly going through my collection and replacing all proxies with the real deal. This deck has been great for randomly messing with people.

Anyone have more good suggestions for this deck? I feel like I could make it even worse (for the opponents!) if I started to really dig.

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Date added 10 months
Last updated 4 months
Legality

This deck is Commander / EDH legal.

Rarity (main - side)

4 - 0 Mythic Rares

28 - 0 Rares

23 - 0 Uncommons

8 - 0 Commons

Cards 100
Avg. CMC 2.98
Tokens Bat 1/1 B, Elemental 1/1 R w/ Haste, Goat 0/1 W, Myr 1/1 C
Folders Commander, Troll decks that seem fun, Funny, Funny
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