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The Giant Bag o' Stuff

Vintage Casual Combo Goodstuff Jank Toolbox

Squee_Spirit_Guide

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Artifact (18)

Instant (7)

Land (22)

Enchantment (8)

Sorcery (5)

Sideboard

Enchantment (8)

Creature (1)

Artifact (1)

Instant (3)

Land (1)

Sorcery (1)

In a tight spot and not sure how to wriggle your way out? Turning the corner and not sure where to go next? In control of the game and not sure how you want to win? Not a problem! Just reach into The Giant Bag o' Stuff and you're sure to find what you're looking for!

This deck makes use of a lot of one-of cards and spectacular (sometimes convoluted) win conditions to keep games from being boring. It fails quickly about 20% of the time and dies a slow death 50% of the time... That other 30% though? Sheer beauty and delight!

Early on, we're looking to stay alive and gain life through an Ivory Tower (or two) paired with a Spellbook, fueled by either a Howling Mine or Land Tax (or both). If we have Land Tax out, Undiscovered Paradise and Rainbow Vale can help force the issue to make sure we're gaining life.

Building Block Breakdown:

Artifacts

  • Winter Orb doesn't make the game very fun, but we don't need many lands to be effective and slowing the game down is very helpful.
  • Meekstone locks down large creatures, which can be problematic for us.
  • Feldon's Cane is something we hope to not tutor/Tinker for, but sometimes we need it to not deck ourselves.

Enchantments

  • Cadaverous Bloom is expensive to get out, but generates more than enough mana when we have 20+ cards in hand.
  • Fastbond... We don't normally need a lot of lands in play, but when we do we need them there in a hurry!
  • Squandered Resources is another way to generate mana. It's cheaper than Cadaverous Bloom but not as explosive.
  • Trade Routes is pretty darn good. Bouncing a land can protect it, set up Land Tax to trigger, give you a land to pitch to Seismic Assault, give you a card to pitch to Cadaverous Bloom, or reset the cumulative upkeep on Glacial Chasm. I guess you can draw a card with the second ability as well if you want.
  • Yawgmoth's Bargain with 4 cards in hand and Ivory Tower in play basically means we can draw as many cards as we want for free. With two or more Ivory Towers we gain life for drawing cards. It's a tough life!

Sideboard

Most cards in the sideboard are things we want to find in the right circumstances and any of them would be targets for our tutors/Tinker as well.

The exciting ways to win

  • Rocket Launcher is the least likely win condition because of how much effort it requires, but it might also be the most spectacular. Generate loads of mana through Channel or Cadaverous Bloom and fire off the rocket for 20+ in a single turn! Yes it actually is possible and once the deck gets set up it's not too hard to come by the mana!
  • Seismic Assault can pretty easily become lethal with all the lands we're drawing or putting into our hand. Having 10 lands to discard to deal 20 damage is relatively easy, just make sure it finishes the job on the spot or we could be in trouble. Seismic Assault also has the benefit of being spot removal if needed.
  • Black Vise on its own is maybe our grindiest win condition. With a couple of Howling Mines out, paired with Winter Orb it should be an easy 3 damage per turn until the job is done. Of course, you can always pair Black Vise with Stroke of Genius to win on the spot (I recommend this option).
  • Speaking of Stroke of Genius... games go long enough and we can generate enough mana that it becomes a psuedo-mill win condition. During your opponent's upkeep cast Stroke of Genius for 50 (or how many cards your opponent has in their library) and hope they cant kill you before their draw step. In their draw step, they can't draw so they lose!

The less exciting ways to win

  • Phyrexian Processor is a very simple win condition for this deck. Ramp it out quickly or Tinker it out early for a steady supply of tokens. Playing it on turn 2 or 3 is usually enough of a head start to get over the line. I normally pay 5 life when it enters play, but ballers pay 10.
  • Fireball is as straightforward as it gets as a win condition. The only interesting thing here is that we can technically use it for a turn one win (Forest or Mountain, all three Lotus Petals, Channel, and Fireball... so, you know, really likely to happen!). Fireball can also be used to control the board in a pinch.

Suggestions

Updates Add

Switch to artifact/enchantment tool box — Nov. 28, 2025
Edit

I gave this deck a pretty major overhaul. The previous version got a little stale, so I updated it to add more (still convoluted) win conditions and focus more on gaining life through Ivory Tower to stay alive and fuel the win conditions. I also removed the creatures and counter magic that were my main defenses, because the life gain is (usually) all I need to survive long enough to get set up. I also changed my plan with the lands from playing them and sacrificing them to Zuran Orb, to keeping them in hand for Ivory Tower. I've found the deck to be a little more resilient in this setup and, despite the win conditions being even wilder, they're much more consistent.

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96% Casual

Competitive