Cards You Should Play in EDH: Goblin Chainwhirler
This is the first short article in a series of articles I might end up continuing. This might-end-up-being-a-series is a hyphen-filled exploration of overlooked cards that I believe should be played far more than they are. So, without further ado, let's get into the card!
Goblin Chainwhirler
Let's start with the mana cost. . Ouch. That's not going in many decks. Mono-Red and main-red 2 color decks are really all that can support that card. But, in those decks, this isn't a problem.
The body on this card is good. A 3/3 for 3 isn't even close to good on its own in EDH, but with first-strike this thing can be a decent blocker, or a powerful aggressive creature.
Now, the ability. When Goblin Chainwhirler enters the battlefield, it deals 1 damage to each opponent and each creature and each planeswalker they control. You might be thinking, "But Z, this doesn't do anything! EDH is a format of big fatties like Eldrazi smashing each other. What is 1 measly damage going to do to an Eldrazi?". You know what, you are right. Ulamog says "Goblin Chainwhirler? I am not scared. ANNIHILATE THE FOOLISH MORTALS!". But, how are you going to cast Ulamog? With lands? No, you use things like Birds of Paradise, Noble Hierarch, Llanowar Elves, and Eldrazi Spawn and Scion tokens. Now, you probably see where this is going...
They all die to the Whirly Gooblin! Mana dorks are just the beginning, lets take a look at commanders which Goblin Chainwhirler says "lol nope" to.
Animar, Soul of Elements: How does it feel to slam T3 Animar only to have it swept up by a Goblin Chainwhirler by an opponent, before you even can put counters on it?
Edgar Markov: Sure, he pumps those tokens. Eventually. Until then,they are just waiting to give your Goobly Whirler some value!
Breya, Etherium Shaper: Not an amazing interaction, but the thopters are definitely gone, plus most decks run Servos and Thopters galore. Sure, Breya sacs some, but what if there is no mana open? Goblin Chainwhirler does what red does best: Smashes things
Prossh, Skyraider of Kher: Sure, they sac the Kobolds to a sac outlet. But they probably were going to combo next turn, or just smash face with a WAY-TOO-BIG/5 flying Prossh. This prevents that.
Krenko, Mob Boss: This only works if the opponent has no anthems, but still very devastating.
Oh, and you know that guy at the table with Thalia, Guardian of Thraben? This kills that and isn't even taxed.
Need 1 turn for your boardwipe to kill that planeswalker that is ready to ultimate? Goblin Chainwhirler buys you that turn, and can even kill post-ult planeswalkers that are at 1 loyalty!
Finally, combat tricks are cool. Most of them are instant speed, but did that Brimaz just eat your 3/3? Bye, Brimaz! Talrand Drakes lock down your weenies? Attack without fear, Whirly Doomgoblin is here!
Goblin Chainwhirler does have an extremely restrictive mana cost, and hence only works in heavy red decks. But in Aggro, this makes favorable attacks, in Midrange it can get 3-for-1s or better easily, and for control I guess it can kill things? Why are you playing main red control anyways? Overall definitely good in EDH, and even just killing a mana dork and getting a 3/3 first strike can be good. I believe that it is absurd that I have cast hundreds of Llanowar Elves, and NOT A SINGLE ONE has been chainwhirled to death, the card is just great.
If you want to see more of these brief articles, post in the comments below!
