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It's raining men, HALLELUJAH!

Commander / EDH*

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THE SHIRTLESS MEN TRIBAL DECK OF BADASSERY

All nonland cards in this deck depict a shirtless man somewhere in the artwork.

I focused mainly on human looking creatures as an extra challenge for myself. Definitely helped narrow down the list of candidates. Includes humans, vampires, pirates, orcs, and some other creature types.

Well, I wanted to add those colors, but I couldn't find a way to add it with the rest. Don't get me wrong, I'm sure there are a lot of shirtless men in green and blue (Garruk is sexy as hell ngl, and I think Jace would look nice without a shirt), but I wanted more colors for more options. Who knows, I might make a U/G version of this down the road.
Merfolk felt too easy (they live in the water ffs, of course they're going to be shirtless), demons, while very attractive, also felt a little too easy. Almost all demons are male and shirtless, and they're not quite as human looking as I would like them to be. Zombies (or just undead in general) are not only too easy because of their deteriorating clothes, but they are also decaying. That's beyond shirtless, and I'm not into that (no judgment, you do you fam). Also, I don't know how to feel about Iroas, God of Victory and Purphoros, God of the Forge . I'm not exactly sure if they're shirtless or not, but they would be bomb in this deck.
Crook of Condemnation : There are nipples and enough chest showing imo to include this.

Phyrexian Arena : In the middle of the card a little to the left, that man is shirtless.

Savage Beating : Okay I admit this one is kind of a stretch. I am still not sure whether to count this as human or not. Reminded me of Koth to an extent which was my reasoning for its inclusion, but I might replace it.

Relentless Assault : Nip slip if you look at the guy on the left (some skin as well). I think that's enough...?

Bearer of the Heavens : He wears a little loin cloth, so unlike all the other common rock people/golems, he has some decency. This also means he has no shirt on, so by definition, he is shirtless.

Colossus of Akros : I know he's not a living, fleshy creature, but dayum he is toned af.

Crush Contraband : The guy in the art is swole, but there's not a lot of skin showing. Might take it out.

The expected gameplan is to beat ass and flex. This is a casual af deck, and I also haven't really playtested it at all. I will update accordingly, but don't expect to win with this.

Suggestions

Updates Add

Did some brief testing with a suggestion (Koth of the Hammer) and it was... strange. I tried it replacing Akroan Skyguard, but it just didn't feel very synergistic with the rest of the deck probably due to it being three colors and because most of my lands are nonbasic (or they don't have the mountain type).

I triple-checked all cards in my commanders' color identity, and I think this list is pretty much finalized more or less. This is until WotC releases another set of course (Viking set wizards plz I want more grizzly and shirtless men).

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Revision 5 See all

(5 years ago)

+1 Burn from Within main
-1 Desperate Gambit main
-1 Divine Offering main
+1 Madcap Skills main
-1 Maraxus of Keld main
+1 Retaliate main
-1 Serene Master main
+1 Utter End main
Top Ranked
  • Achieved #1 position overall 5 years ago
Date added 5 years
Last updated 5 years
Legality

This deck is Commander / EDH legal.

Rarity (main - side)

7 - 0 Mythic Rares

39 - 0 Rares

24 - 0 Uncommons

16 - 0 Commons

Cards 100
Avg. CMC 3.16
Tokens Copy Clone, Gold, Pirate 2/2 B, The Monarch, Treasure
Folders Ideas, Decks that impressed me, Bookmarks, Favorite Decks, Other People's Decks, Good ideas, decks i like, other people's decks, Faves, Cool EDH
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