I might have a crush on a girl
Social forum
Posted on June 17, 2015, 12:23 a.m. by Chadtherest00
I know that's a wired title seeing as its not magic related. But it has a magic related story to it... So I was at the shop right at the start of this format and I noticed there was like a few girl players there chillin. I sat down to talk to the one I think is the most pro. N she started impressing me with what she was running. Se told me she was running jund... N I found this kinda cute. Then we started talking bout color combinations and I was like yeah grixis n she's like o that's like my second favorite color combination... N that little spark once again. I tried not to make myself look dumb or say something she might disagree with so I told her I had to go. Through the format she impressed me by having real badass trades. N just one time I gave her like 15 bucks extra in trades.. I was like yeah I think ur cute enough for that. Then I found out she has all this meta... I was like god damn where did you get this stuff... I didn't get to look at her shiny stuff... But while she was trading I noticed that she has a foil I was looking for. I was like omg I need that. Nervousness kicked in again... N I kept my mouth shut. But I thought it was cute cause she knew and had a foil copy of the card I liked... I was wondering if someone on the system cause we use dci could put me in a match with her that way we get to interact...
Chadtherest00 says... #3
Fuck but I suck at this relationship thing. I haven't had a gf in years...
June 17, 2015 12:35 a.m.
brandontraps says... #5
Hmm I'm guessing you're kinda young? I'm not exactly old myself but looking back you see the mistakes you've made. Don't be clingy right off the bat. It's a huge turnoff for women. I was gonna knock you for giving her stuff, but saying "yea, you're cute enough for that" is the right way to do it lol. Instead of focusing on competing against her, ask for her number and play magic at her/your place. Anyways I'm no Don Juan so take all this with a grain of salt.
June 17, 2015 12:38 a.m.
No Pain no Gain.
Remember this. No one approaches these situations without having some sort of fear. Just be sincere and ask her if you could have her number. Start there and baby step your way into the future.
Trust me. Do nothing and you'll always regret not saying something. DO say something and either it works out or the pain is short and you can move on knowing the answer
June 17, 2015 12:41 a.m.
Servo_Token says... #7
That's not how matches work, first off...
And definitely don't just go up and hit on her. No girl, regardless of where they're at but especially when they're just out to have a good time with their friends, wants to hear "Eee bby, Yoo lookin Fyyyyyyyyne".
Infatuation is one hell of a state, and it can definitely wreck what could otherwise be a fantastic friendship. Don't do anything stupid, is my advice.
Based strictly on this post, as i've no other information to go off of, it seems like you met someone you found attractive, started casual interaction, and made off before you did something that might ruin future interaction which seems like the right move.
Relationships based off of friendship, companionship, and mutual affection are strictly better, in magic terms, than relationships based on physical intimacy and driven by infatuation. What that means is that you should just take a few weeks and get to know her as a friend. Be friendly, courteous, and respectful. If she shows signs of seeking friendship, just take things as they come and move naturally, thinking about what you do before you do it. I'll reiterate the point that the last thing that you want to do is something stupid.
Also, i've never thought that i'd ever give relationship advice on TappedOut. This is certainly a new one.
June 17, 2015 12:44 a.m.
"Se told me she was running jund... N I found this kinda cute."
This made my night. Thank you so much for this beautiful post. :)
June 17, 2015 1 a.m.
scopesightzx says... #9
I'd assume she's at your shop semi frequently? If so, ask if the two of you could hang before events and chill, maybe get some food in between rounds (if you have the time)
June 17, 2015 1:11 a.m.
scopesightzx says... #11
I have had people give me sarcastic advice before at my lgs. Someone told me to open with "Ayy gurl, u wan sum dik?" before, and it has become the first thing I tell people not to open with.
June 17, 2015 2:03 a.m.
honestly, I'd say to just be yourself. Don't try to fake someone you're not because it gets real weird real quick. Otherwise, ThatJunkMage's advice is solid.
also i just had to... PLOT TWIST: THE GIRL IS ON T/O
June 17, 2015 2:18 a.m.
The first thing you should learn is proper spelling, and decent grammar. Women don't like stupid men. Knock off that n isht before you get her number to start texting her.
My suggestion is to try and be a little more smooth about it. There's no need to just come out of no where and ask her out, how do you know she's even your type? If I were you I'd ask for her number so you can invite her the next time your friends get together to play edh, or ask if she and her friends want to go to a big tournament you're planning to attend (like a pptq or an scgopen or something). This is your very non-commital way to get her number, and try to build a friendship with her. Invite her along to something she likes that you're randomly doing anyway (her friends too). If she doesn't want to, then you had no real chance anyway. But if she's down, ask her to more stuff, then after a few weeks you can just randomly tell her you're bored one night and ask her out to eat and to see that new antman movie or whatever, BC none of your other friends want to go or they're busy. Then if you still like her and she actually went with you, you can tell her without much fear that you've fallen for her over the weeks you've been friends, and she will most likely be willing to give you a chance, since she already is anyway.
Anyway, that's just what I'd do.
June 17, 2015 2:21 a.m.
SimicPower says... #14
tempest: Quick! Tag all of the girls on TO! ... JK I hope
June 17, 2015 2:22 a.m.
wish12oz- the only part i disagree with is the movie. it provides no opportunity to communicate or learn more about each other.
June 17, 2015 2:30 a.m.
SimicPower says... #16
tempest: I agree. Movie dates are a bit cliche.
Chadtherest00: It would be useful to know your age. Advice will be different if you are 18 vs. 40.
June 17, 2015 2:40 a.m.
Ahhh, MtG. The ultimate way to pickup girls :P
Step 1: buy a Black Lotus
Step 2: Impress her with said Black Lotus
Step 3: ???
Step 4: Profit.
Seriously though some actual advice. I would actually recommend against deliberately screwing yourself out of trades becuase you think she's cute or whatever. Having a gf who I met through playing magic myself, one of her biggest pet peeves is when people either a) treat her like she doesn't know anything about MtG becuase she's a girl or b) give her special treatment because she's a girl. She's one of the most competent magic players I know. Remember, girls are just people too and you should treat them as such.
Get to know her. Just becuase you both play magic doesn't mean you're soulmates. "Hey, you play blue and I play blue, we must be meant for each other" or similar is a really bad idea to base a relationship on. Spend a bit of time talking to her, and as a person, not just as a girl. If you feel there is a basis for the relationship, then take the plunge and ask her out. Beating around the bush is stupid and won't get you anywhere.
But one thing I would recommend, read the kind of body language you're getting from her. If she doesn't seem interested, don't push it. If she seem interested and you talk to her and do ask her out, then take the answer she gives you. If she says yes, awesome. If she says no, be polite and leave it at that. Remember, just because you ask somebody out doesn't mean they'll automatically say yes (and they don't need to justify why if they say no) but it also isn't neccessarily a reflection on you (just make sure you don't act like a jerk).
As most people have said, be yourself. Because at the end of it all, thats who you're stuck with. So you don't want to have people like somebody that you're actually not.
And if you have any questions, feel free to ask. Nothing wrong with that.
June 17, 2015 2:55 a.m.
Chadtherest00 says... #18
Funny you should mention that. She kinda tripped about my age.... One of my friends was kind enough to put us both on the spot wen he mentioned that I was 26 years old. She's 18 but idk I guess that's still kinda immediating. Sooooo then he told me "o dude you don't know she likes you??" n she smiled but I remained speechless. I was like "ooooo ok lol thanks buddy" then another friend said make you're move... I was like shit lol... And I stood up and walked away... But next time around I wanna just ask her out on a date.. Like ask her if she wants to go out before I leave.. Soo wit some luck she ll tell me yes and idk I'll get her contact info n try making her mine..
June 17, 2015 2:56 a.m.
Chadtherest00 says... #19
Lol yeah I asked bout that and she said she d be impressed by that. But I was kinda like yeah lol that's never happening... I think if I could I would have to take some time to learn some of her favorite cards m find foil versions of them. I know through magic years there's been at least of couple of certain cards that can spell out affection.. With out blowing everything I have on a card I'm not even impressed with
June 17, 2015 3:06 a.m.
HouseOfShadow says... #20
Never make poor trades with the opposite gender because you think they're cute. It's condescending and sexist. Ask if she'd like to go out for coffee and Magic some time, or something similar. Don't be a typical dude, essentially. The term "guys will be guys" is moronic.
June 17, 2015 5:46 a.m.
I guess this is about interaction while playing magic so the social forum seems to fit.... hmm.....
Edit: people keep using the word 'meta' in a way that doesn't fit. Is there a new slang meaning for meta that I don't know about. Meta used to mean the overall makeup of top decks or top groups of something in a game or sport. Someone cannot 'HAVE' meta. When did this change?
June 17, 2015 6:03 a.m. Edited.
Step 1: Find her on Facebook.
Step 2: Add her as a friend and like her profile picture.
Step 3: Ask her out to play some MTG when you are drunk. If she says yes; Bingo. If no; Just tell her you were drunk.
There you go. That's how you start a friendship/relationship.
June 17, 2015 6:14 a.m.
Epochalyptik says... #23
God damnit just write "and." "N" makes you sound like a fool and makes it hard to sympathize with you.
Anyway... 26 to 18 is a steep ratio. Some girls are ok with that. A lot aren't. And a lot of other people also aren't ok with that. Just something to be aware of. You don't want to come across as the old guy in the Mustang who sits in high school parking lots.
Also, be careful about making it obvious that everything she does somehow infatuates you. There's a fine line between "smitten" and "creeper," and that line gets razor thin when you add in huge age differences.
June 17, 2015 7:14 a.m.
Half your age add seven is the traditional theory as to the youngest age you can date. So from 26 you get 20. It's meaningless though.
June 17, 2015 7:41 a.m.
Epochalyptik says... #25
Doesn't mean people won't view it as taboo or awkward. If both parties are genuinely happy, in this case, then it's not so much of an obstacle, I guess. But it generally doesn't work for awkward guys.
June 17, 2015 7:45 a.m.
NoPantsParade says... #26
First of all I recommend making an attempt at proper grammar and spelling, if you're going to be texting her. It makes you look smarter and less of a fool. But if English isn't your first language, I'm sure she'll understand.
With that said, next time you see her, ask for her number before you leave. Develop a friendship by talking to her and suggesting to hang out if she seems interested. The important thing is to build a friendship first before diving into a relationship. Since the age difference is rather steep, you have to be careful with what you say and do as she and others might perceive it differently.
June 17, 2015 9:12 a.m.
Chadtherest00 says... #27
Idk of the age difference matters that much maybe I should just go find someone older.
June 17, 2015 12:32 p.m.
Idk if this is some crazy y2k shit but... IndepenantMeta just got post blocked for a few days by Yeago and this guy sounds like... exactly the same. Sorry if this is outta line but isn't having multiple accounts a no-no?
If I'm wrong sorry for distracting but... this sounds just like Meta.
June 17, 2015 12:56 p.m.
Epochalyptik says... #29
The boss and I are way ahead of you.
This post has become even more hilarious.
June 17, 2015 1:11 p.m.
Servo_Token says... #30
Based on the posts that are presently on JWiley129's home page, I'd say that you're correct. Doesn't mean that the advice in the thread is any less "correct", but it could potentially lead to a downward trend in the quality of posts.
Also, if you're 26, hit on people closer to your own age. Match.com is another thing that you can be using. The difference between 26 and 18 is a lot bigger than the difference between 38 and 30 when looking from the perspectives of both involved parties, as well as the surrounding parties (IE Parents). I wouldn't want my 18 year old daughter going out with some dude in his near 30s that she met at a game store.
June 17, 2015 1:11 p.m.
NoPantsParade says... #31
It says he joined 10 months ago. Did he create multiple accounts knowing he was going to get banned at some point on one of them?
Also, ThatJunkMage is right. Find someone older.
June 17, 2015 1:16 p.m.
Servo_Token says... #32
Wait, didn't Meta say that he had a son that was old enough to play Magic and YuGiOh himself? The fuck is happening in this thread... The fuck is happening in the world, is probably a better question.
June 17, 2015 1:17 p.m.
Meta lied about A LOT of stuff
Edit: or at least it's strongly suspected he did.
June 17, 2015 1:19 p.m. Edited.
NoPantsParade says... #34
You don't think Meta sent his son to carry on his legacy, do you?
June 17, 2015 1:20 p.m.
I knew chad was IM. No one else talks like that. Also did you see how he tried to defend IM (himself) on jwiley's page? Most amusing.
June 17, 2015 2:17 p.m.
xzzane - I won't necessarily defend Chad or IM, but I can believe some lurking users could see us as bullies towards IM. Like yeaGO has said before, we should be kinder to new users and not go "it's obvious you dummy!" everytime a user says "Why are fetchlands good? They hurt you!" or the like.
June 17, 2015 2:23 p.m.
I definitely believe in being kinder to new users, especially over things like fetchlands, which some people might genuinely not understand about. The problem is the majority of the regulars here are incredibly tired of IM, which may lead to new users thinking that IM is being bullied if they don't know who he is. I'm not really sure how, or even if, there is a solution to that.
June 17, 2015 2:29 p.m.
Epochalyptik says... #40
Locking this because it's all downhill from here.
Yes, everyone needs to be kind to new users. That's pretty basic. And the regulars around here are often guilty of goading and mob mentality when it comes to arguments. How often does someone post "grabs popcorn" or "subbing for the lols" instead of writing something productive?
This is the subject of one of the ongoing discussions at the administrative level. And it needs to stop. If you see something problematic, report it. Don't incite anything. Don't join in. Don't make the community toxic.
June 17, 2015 2:48 p.m.
ThisIsBullshit says... #41
But don't be jumping on every poor user who has somewhat poor grammar just because they "seem like IM"
Anyways, on topic, if there's a girl playing Magic don't do dumb shit like do bad trades because, as a girl, if you do that I will exploit the hell out of you. If you hang out and chill enough, you can ask for her number and text/Facebook message/whatever.
Most of us are pretty open-minded and don't mind talking to fellow nerds/Magic players.
VampireArmy says... #2
Gotta take that first step yourself there, bud ;) gooooood luuuuuuuck!
June 17, 2015 12:34 a.m.