Best Card Flavor
General forum
Posted on Feb. 3, 2015, 6:28 a.m. by magnetcrocodile
There are many thing that makes people want to play MTG. The lores are great, the gameplay is addictive, and the artwork is pleasing to the eye.
Another thing that attract players, old and new alike, are the card flavor. What do you think is the best flavor cards in MTG?
I have a few select one, and unsurprisingly, most of them are Gruul cards:
Borborygmos: "It's easy to see why those Gruul dirtbags follow him--the only orders he gives are Crush them' and We eat'" --Teysa
Giant Solifuge: "We respect all lifeforms, but this one we respect from a distance." --Mandor, Selesnya ranger
Gruul War Plow: "Steering apparatus? What for? Rip it out, sharpen it, and lash it to the front" --Ktank, Gruul plowmaster
Scab-Clan Giant: For the Gruul, bone-crushing rage is the first priority. Accuracy comes in a distant ninetieth.
Zhur-Taa Swine: Gurley was the first to domesticate one, though his widow didn't take much solace in that accomplishment.
And an old-time favorite:
Gorilla Titan: "I want a banana this big"
magnetcrocodile says... #3
Fodder Cannon is hilarious
Also these cards are what I call 'bait cards'. I tend to leave them face-up in a public area((like a coffee table)), so my non-MTG friends(muggle) can read them, and get interested. MWAHAHAHA
February 3, 2015 6:47 a.m.
BlueEyesRedMage says... #4
February 3, 2015 6:47 a.m.
JohnnyBaggins says... #5
Not on the same level as your guys, since I enjoy the more serious flavors a bit more:
Heartwood Storyteller - His roots reach deep, nurtured not by soil and rains, but by millennia of experience.
Dungrove Elder - All the trees of the forest are his army and every leaf his shield.
Sylvan Caryatid - Those who enter the copse never leave. They find peace here and take root, becoming part of the ever-growing grove.
I'm a sucker for treefolk.
February 3, 2015 6:54 a.m.
Werebear - puns are the best. By far my favorite.
Inspiration - Day 31: I have succeeded in my time reversal experiment.Day 30: I might have a problem here.
Adaptive Snapjaw - "Eh, needs more toad."Gulistan, Simic biomancer
Furnace Whelp - Baby dragons can't figure out humansif they didn't want to be killed, why were they made of meat and treasure?
Goblin Offensive - They certainly are.
Totally Lost - Fblthp had always hated crowds.
Armored Pegasus - Asked how it survived a run-in with a bog imp, the pegasus just shook its mane and burped.
Brink of Disaster - "When you find yourself teetering on the edge of oblivion, mine will be the hands taking pleasure in giving you the final push."Liliana Vess
February 3, 2015 6:56 a.m.
There are many words and phrases that can cause an experienced wizard to tremble in fear. Chief among them is "oops."
I want a banana this big!
February 3, 2015 6:58 a.m.
A cople of classics I forgot:
Null Rod - Gerrard: "But it doesn't do anything!"Hanna: "Noit does nothing."
Hex - "When killing five just isn't enough"
Niv-Mizzet, the Firemind - turn your screen/card sideways.
February 3, 2015 7:10 a.m.
hyperlocke says... #10
I just love Lignify.
Bulgo paused, puzzled. What was that rustling sound, and why did he feel so stiff? And how could his feet be so thirsty?
February 3, 2015 7:16 a.m.
"What is the sound of one head snapping?"
I love this card but everything about it makes me cringe all over which makes me appreciate it even more.
February 3, 2015 9:06 a.m.
MattTheNinja says... #12
Lightmine Field is pretty good, but Werebear is definitely my favorite
February 3, 2015 9:43 a.m.
slovakattack says... #13
My personal favorite is Divine Verdict.
"Guilty."
Also, Canyon Minotaur.
"We'll scale these cliffs, traverse Brittle Bridge, and then fight our way down the volcanic slopes on the other side."
"Isn't the shortest route through the canyon?"
"Yes."
"So shouldn't we-"
"No."
February 3, 2015 10:21 a.m.
magnetcrocodile says... #14
@Oakenwind yeah, cards with menacing/serious flavor are also nice, like Hero's Downfall
Also mentioning an all-time fave, Last Word
February 3, 2015 10:42 a.m.
magnetcrocodile says... #15
And how could we forget Wave of Indifference
February 3, 2015 10:44 a.m.
sergiodelrio says... #16
February 3, 2015 10:50 a.m.
razvaniorga says... #17
The two greatest serious flavor texts for me personally are:
Phyrexian Hulk 8th Edition
It doesn't think. It doesn't feel. It doesn't laugh or cry. All it does from dusk till dawn is make the soldiers die. - Onean children's rhyme
And Wandering Ones
"I saw them once, when I was a child. They led me to my parents' arms when I was lost. Why have they abandoned me now? Why won't they take me home again?" - Unnamed beggar
February 3, 2015 10:52 a.m.
KnightsBattlecry001 says... #18
Foul Imp and Macetail Hystrodon always gave me a laugh.
February 3, 2015 11:13 a.m.
happyman379 says... #19
Disciple of the Old Ways is my personal favourite.
February 3, 2015 11:15 a.m.
HolyFalcon says... #20
Pacifism For the first time in his life, Grakk felt a little warm and fuzzy inside.
February 3, 2015 12:52 p.m.
My favorite would have to be War-Torch Goblin
"In a town shaped by the subtle machinations and political intrigue of its guilds, it's reassuring to see a goblin waving his torch and screaming about some nonsense or other."Agrus Kos
February 3, 2015 1:06 p.m.
I personally really love Nirkana Revenant's flavor text, art and power. Wrapped all in one it's really awesome.
"Hate is an everlasting wellspring from which it is eternally sustained."
February 3, 2015 1:21 p.m.
Hjaltrohir says... #23
Duress Im not going to take all your secrets, just your most precious one.
February 3, 2015 1:58 p.m.
Hjaltrohir says... #24
Also, Defy Death and Archangel of Thune. I like angels :)
February 3, 2015 1:58 p.m.
CrovaxTheCursed says... #25
Surprised to see that Chub Toad hasn't got a mention yet. That was always a favorite of mine.
I also really like Master the Way. Such a true statement...
February 3, 2015 2:09 p.m.
Goblin Arsonist aka: Goblin Uncle Ben..."With great power comes great risk of getting yourself killed."
Lava Axe - "A strict upgrade over the cinder hatchet."
Sizzle - "Of course you should fight fire with fire. You should fight everything with fire."
lesser know, Might of Oaks (7th through 10th edition) - "Guess where I'm gonna plant this!"
February 3, 2015 2:27 p.m.
I always liked Devouring Deep. Any card that makes kids want to read Shakespeare is boss.
February 3, 2015 3:36 p.m.
These are all hilarious, but this forum is missing some of my favorites.
Firstly, Lhurgoyf. Second, Innistrad has so many cards just bursting with flavor, like Burn at the Stake and Gallows at Willow Hill. Third, how come I never see War Report?
February 3, 2015 4:04 p.m.
magnetcrocodile says... #29
@awesomeguy37 yeah, angels are awesome. My favorite is Serra Angel
February 3, 2015 5:50 p.m.
The Doctor says... #30
Sorry I'm late to the thread.
The answer you're looking for is Storm Crow.
February 4, 2015 10:34 p.m.
magnetcrocodile says... #31
@The Doctor Whoa, man. What the hell
All of us just want to feel safe on thread here man, do NOT mention HIM. Because if you mention his name.. HE'll know... HE'll know...
February 5, 2015 4:08 a.m.
brcap I prefer the 7th edition (i think) flavor text of Lava Axe.
"Catch!"And apologies for the necro...
June 5, 2015 12:17 p.m. Edited.
"Catch!" is cool too, but how can you not love that 4th wall breaking commentary on MTG players? It's about as close as we'll ever get to the flavour text on something like Primeval Titan being: "still dies to doomblade".
Gidgetimer says... #2
Enormous Baloth is my favorite flavor text:
"Its diet consists of fruits, plants, small woodland animals, large woodland animals, woodlands, fruit groves, fruit farmers, and small cities."
Fodder Cannon is also good:
"Step 1: Find your cousin.
Step 2: Get your cousin in the cannon.
Step 3: Find another cousin."
February 3, 2015 6:39 a.m.