Suckin' Necks and Cashin' Checks

Pauper Aggro BR (Rakdos) Jank Theme/Gimmick Tribal Vampires

Landonius

Creature (16)

• 4x Bloodmad Vampire
• 4x Guul Draz Vampire
• 4x Olivia's Dragoon
• 2x Pulse Tracker
• 2x Twins of Maurer Estate

Land (20)

• 4x Bloodfell Caves
• 4x Mountain
• 3x Rakdos Guildgate
• 9x Swamp

Instant (13)

• 4x Lightning Bolt
• 2x Rites of Initiation
• 4x Terminate
• 3x Vampiric Fury

Sorcery (11)

• 4x Alms of the Vein
• 1x Bump in the Night
• 2x Faithless Looting
• 4x Night's Whisper

---

Sideboard

Instant (10)

• 2x Diabolic Edict
• 3x Doom Blade
• 2x Electrickery
• 3x Smash to Smithereens

Sorcery (3)

• 3x Blightning

Creature (2)

• 2x Child of Night

---

Maybeboard

Instant (2)

• 1x Disfigure
• 1x Fiery Temper

Enchantment (1)

• 1x Prophetic Ravings

Sorcery (2)

• 1x Call to the Netherworld
• 1x Stensia Banquet

Creature (2)

• 1x Shadow Alley Denizen
• 1x Vampire Lacerator

---

"Yo wassup my @#!&$ lemme get a taste of yo neck." "Eyyy, watch it there, George! You're gonna get blood all over my shoes."

I don't know, man. Ever wanted to suck a neck with a bunch of furious vampire thugs? You're going to love Suckin' Necks and Cashin' Checks.

It's a tribal aggro/burn deck with a hint of madness. Use Guul Draz Vampire and Pulse Tracker to establish some early-game board presence, or slap down an Olivia's Dragoon and go nuts with madness. There are also a total of 9 burn cards in the deck that can each be cast for as little as 1 mana each. Oh, yeah and the deck is only $25 in paper. (Half the price of the deck comes from the playset of Lightning Bolt)

THE CARDS

CREATURES

Guul Draz Vampire AKA "Lil McDrazzy" - a nice cheap vampire that gets big pretty quick due to all the aggressive cards in the list.

Bloodmad Vampire AKA "King BloodMcMeezy" - an extremely aggro card that, if you can madness him out turn 3 with a Faithless Looting or something, does a whole lotta suckin'. The good kind.

Pulse Tracker AKA "Trackalacka" - a nice little vampire who does two damage per attack if he isn't blocked for one mana. This is an extremely flexible spot, so feel free to make adjustments.

Olivia's Dragoon AKA "Lil Livvy" - A vampire discard outlet that can also bash in some damage in the air. He works well with the pump spells.

Twins of Maurer Estate AKA "Shakka and Flakka McMaurer Estateakka" - A nice madness outlet with a surprisingly massive body for two little twins. Good blocker, too.

PUMP

Rites of Initiation - makes for explosive turns. You can use it to discard a bunch of madness stuff for value, or you can discard your hand to win a game out of nowhere with a couple unblocked vamps.

Vampiric Fury - +2/+0 and first strike at instant speed for two mana ain't bad. This bonus applies to all 16 of the creatures in the deck.

REMOVAL/BURN

THE CARD, THE MYTH, THE LEGEND, Lightning Bolt.

Terminate - Two mana. Kills anything. On color. Frickin' awesome artwork. Playset.

Alms of the Vein - a sweet lifeswing for one mana with madness. It's got a vampire on it.

Bump in the Night - unsettling laughter

CARD DRAW

Night's Whisper - Super edgy artwork.

Faithless Looting - A cheap madness enabler that should probably be a four-of

Lands

9 Swamps and 4 Mountains. Rakdos gets it done

4 Bloodfell Caves - Lifegain + color fixing.

3 Rakdos Guildgate - Could be Rakdos Carnarium or Evolving Wilds if your heart so desires

SIDEBOARD Show

Blightning - for combo decks and for decks weak to burn

Diabolic Edict - for hexproof dweebs

Doom Blade - extra removal for creature-heavy decks

Electrickery - for White Tokens and Bogles

Smash to Smithereens - for Affinity and similar shenanigans

I had fun making up thug names for vampires. If you like this deck or want to try it out for yourself, let me know! Any and all suggestions to add to the deck's competitiveness or flavor are welcome. Make sure your suggestions are common cards, because this is pauper after all.

Peace out, my gangstas.

Date added	6 years
Last updated	6 years
Exclude colors	G
Splash colors	W
Legality	This deck is Pauper legal.
Cards	60
Avg. CMC	1.98
Folders	Budget Decks, Pauper