ARE YOU TIRED OF 3 HOUR COMMANDER GAMES? DO YOU WANT TO PLAY 3-4 GAMES WITH YOUR FRIENDS AT COMMANDER NIGHT? WELL BOY HOWDY, THIS DECK WON'T LET YOU DOWN. YOU ALSO MIGHT NEED NEW FRIENDS AFTERWARDS, THIS DECK IS FULL OF INDISCRIMINATE CHAOS AND DESTRUCTION.
Norin's Wild Ride, a primer.
Welcome to the Wild Wild Deserts of Norin the Wary's chaotic adventure. You'll plumb the depths of your deck looking for a God to Worship, Purphoros, God of the Forge. You'll hopefull make lots of friends along the way, and they'll help you guide your friends to the light, the light at the end of the tunnel, where they die. The point of this deck is to sow chaos into your games. You'll deal mass damage around the table, most of the time indiscriminately, so it means you're doing it in a "Fair" way. But that'll put a huge target on your head. You don't have much interaction, and even less reactionary plays, so just plow ahead and keep smacking people for as much as you can before you die!
This is not a deck for spikes. YOU WILL NOT WIN MANY GAMES. That's not the point of this deck. Get ready to take 2nd place a lot. You'll wantonly throw damage around until one or two other players remain, generally at a low life total, and then you'll die. And then the game will end, and you can shuffle up and play again! FUN!
Important cards:
Ya boi, Norin the Wary. If you're here reading this, Norin has already dropped his torch and run away. But don't worry, he'll be back. That's why Norin is amazing. He's a repeatable ETB trigger, nigh unkillable, and costs R. Play him turn 1, never keep a hand without a mountain, and attack every turn with him, it's the key to making the deck work. He's the center of many key interactions in this deck. We'll get into those.
The Sling King himself Purphoros, God of the Forge. He slings damage around like no other. in a 4 person game, if everyone plays a spell or attacks during that cycle, he'll deal 8 damage to your opponents. or 20% of their starting life. You won't usually make him into a creature if you can help it, so he can't be hit by creature removal. This card is A1 Prime BEEF.
Purphoros effects. you'll want these, but they're just shadows of the king they worship. They are in no particular order:
Impact Tremors deals 1 damage, half as exciting as Purphoros, for half the cost.
Pandemonium The same damage as the God, but targeted. Can hit Creatures though!
Warstorm Surge Again, targeted damage equal to the power of the creature entering, so good, but not amazing.
Terror of the Peaks is like Warstorm Surge.
Cards that increase the damage you deal!
Embermaw Hellion Increases all damage you deal from red sources by 1. Makes Purphoros lightning bolt everone.
Jaya, Venerated Firemage Does the same as above. Slightly harder to kill.
Furnace of Rath Doubles all damage dealt! AMAZING!
Dictate of the Twin Gods A 5 mana Furnace of Rath with Flash! Always welcome here.
Firey Emancipation! A new card! A 6CMC Furnace of Rath! wait does that say TRIPLE ALL DAMAGE?!?! It does my friend, it sure does.
Torbran, Thane of Red Fell This card is also amazing, it adds an extra little shock to all red damage you deal! Get it? A little Shock?
Panharmonicon Norin ETBs a lot, A LOT, so why not double all the triggers he makes!
The weird cards that are amazing.
Confusion in the Ranks This card will cause your opponents to hate you. Norin enables this card like no other. You play this, Norin runs away. EOT Norin comes back, you give him to someone else and take their best creature. Someone plays a spell, Norin runs away, rinse and... oh, wait. Norin comes back to you again! You steal another creature! No-one puts Norin in the corner.
Outpost Siege A modular enchantment. You can get some card advantage (hint hint, chose this option), or deal a little extra damage when Norin blinks.
Valakut Exploration, very similar to the above, just a bit of card advantage with the added benefit of throwing some damage around.
Experimental Frenzy This card is instrumental to keeping going. There's not a ton of card advantage in this deck, this is one key piece.
Tome of Legends This card is the absolute best Card Draw in the whole deck. Norin ETBs so often you'll almost never be able to run this card out of counters. It essentially reads (1)Tap: Draw a Card. A+++++++
Genesis Chamber You'll get lots of tokens with this card. They will each trigger Purphoros or Impact Termors. Super super important to getting the most damage in in the shortest amount of time.
The rest of the deck should be pretty self explanatory. Ramp with rocks, play some cards, deals some damage, die.
You'll do that a lot. But hopefully, by the time you die, you'll have dealt an astronomical amount of damage for a 1cmc cowardly boi. I've played 4 player games and dealt 116 damage only to place second. This deck is for both sadists and masochists alike. Have fun!
