Ah, to be royalty - nothing feels quite like it. This deck is an homage to that feeling.

This deck is unique in that it requires a bit of roleplay to enjoy fully - when you pilot it, your primary goal is to become the monarch (AKA Queen Bitch) and remain the monarch for the entirety of the game. Winning is a secondary concern.

Since the only way to steal the crown from us is to deal combat damage to us, we have to do our best to prevent that from happening. The most straightforward way to do this is by pillowforting! Tax the hell out of any potential attackers with Archangel of Tithes, Archon of Absolution, Baird, Steward of Argive, Ghostly Prison, Koskun Falls, Kazuul, Tyrant of the Cliffs, Norn's Annex, Sphere of Safety, and Windborn Muse. We can also just persuade them not to attack without taxing them using No Mercy, Teysa, Envoy of Ghosts, and Stuffy Doll. If we're lucky we may even be able to lock players out of attacking us at all with Orzhov Advokist or Island Sanctuary!
It's possible our opponents find a way around our fort of pillows, so we come prepared with a suite of the finest Mardu removal spells to back ourselves up. Being in Mardu gives us access to white's exile and wrath effects, Rakdos planeswalker destruction, and Orzhov permanent destruction. No problematic permanent sticks long if we don't want it to!
Even with our suite of exceptional removal and out pillowforting package, our opponents may be tempted to try to take the crown from us. We can manipulate their fear by threatening huge targetted plays, and we can make an example out of those foolish enough to try and take it from us. Captive Audience, Curse of Bloodletting, Overwhelming Splendor, and Cruel Reality aren't generally seen in commander decks since their single-target nature makes them less effective in the primarily multiplayer format. We use that to our advantage here though, relying less on their effects and more on the fear they evoke. When an opponent knows you're capable of setting them back to the stone age while leaving yourself (AND their other opponents!) intact, they're much more likely to avoid you and treat your itneractions carefully. Stuffy Doll, Virtus's Maneuver, and Xantcha, Sleeper Agent all achieve the same effect on a much smaller scale. These can be dumped on someone who destroyed your creature rather than stole the crown, just to show the table you mean business.
Tyrannical dictators that do nothing but punish their subjects tend to be overthrown and/or murdered violently. We don't want either of those things, so we have to balance our cruel targetted punishments with exceptional targetted gifts. Opponents who help us defend our crown, or who actively work against other opponents rather than us, can find themselves on the recieving end of magnificent gifts such as tokens from Hunted Dragon, Hunted Horror, Hunted Lammasu, or Forbidden Orchard. We can grant them mana when they need it with Victory Chimes and Spectral Searchlight, or card advantage with Bloodgift Demon, Xantcha, Sleeper Agent, and Virtus's Maneuver.
If our opponents are clever, they may stop and realize that we're playing them like fools. In order to stop that from happening (and stop them from ganging up on us), we need to... 'encourage' a little chaos. Cards like Disrupt Decorum, Master Warcraft, Boros Battleshaper, Rite of the Raging Storm, Xantcha, Sleeper Agent, and Crown of Doom either encourage or force our opponents to attack each other. This stirs the waters of retaliation, and soon your opponents will have forgotten about you and will be at each other's throats. Mathas, Fiend Seeker, Council's Judgment, and Head Games all allow us to manipulate what kind of interaction gets played, by who, and on what. This serves to stir the waters even more, which is exactly what we want.
Every kingdom needs a court, and every court needs lords and ladies to fill it and talk about royal things like the superior horse breed and which side cutlery goes on and how best to murder your political opposition. Every creature in here serves a dual purpose - they either fit one of the aforementioned categories, or they have some ability to massively swing a multiplayer game in your favor like Gisela, Blade of Goldnight, Sepulchral Primordial, or Molten Primordial


Updates Add

Swapped the bounce lands for check lands. Change was a long time coming, only just got around to picking them up. Might swap the temples for filters? Also want to fit in strip mine, wasteland, and urborg


Top Ranked
  • Achieved #1 position overall 6 months ago
Date added 2 years
Last updated 2 months

This deck is Commander / EDH legal.

Rarity (main - side)

13 - 0 Mythic Rares

51 - 0 Rares

18 - 0 Uncommons

3 - 0 Commons

Cards 100
Avg. CMC 3.85
Tokens */* Horror, 3/3 Centaur, 1/1 Spirit, 1/1 Elemental, 1/1 Assassin, 2/2 Zombie, 3/3 Ogre, Monarch, 2/2 Knight, 4/4 Angel, 1/1 City's Blessing
Folders Commander, Marchesa Ideas, Future Decks, Decks to Build, Stuff I like, Deck Ideas, To play test, Things I Like, EDH decks i wanna build lol, Decks that aren't mine, See all 20
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Revision 23 See all

4 months ago)

-1 Boros Garrison main
+1 Clifftop Retreat main
+1 Dragonskull Summit main
+1 Isolated Chapel main
-1 Orzhov Basilica main
-1 Rakdos Carnarium main