pie chart

I Drink Your Milkshake

Standard Control U/B (Dimir)



You got yourself a nice milkshake.

I drink your milkshake. With Tezzeret the Thirsty


We laugh ourselves silly at the fact that you have no milkshake, you have no Creatures, and you have no hope.

is appreciated if you like this deck.

C'mon, show some love.

This deck has a very specific purpose, which is to beat the Approach of the Second Sun and Dinosaur decks which are dominating my local meta.

All suggestions made for this deck will be considered. That doesn't mean they will automatically be adopted, no matter how special you think they/you are.

I see decks very differently than most people. I know what suits my play style, and my local meta.

I don't follow deck building "formulas".

Think before making a suggestion. If you are going to insist up front that it is the ONLY thing that can make this deck better, or make snide comments about my choice of cards/theme, or if you are going to be a jerk in general, then save us both the trouble and just go away.

Do some research before pointing out that my cards aren't Standard legal.
I usually know What's In Standard

I am doing an experiment with this deck, after chatting with StuBi.

He is an Actuary. Probability is what he does.

He reckons that, because this deck has 26 Lands, it has a good probability of working with 61 cards.

We shall see.

This plays like every other Control deck, so I'm not going to write lots of specific notes for it.

Here are some general principles:

  • Look at your Opponent's hand as often as you can, so you can play in accordance with the spells they are holding.

  • Play spells on your Opponent's Turn, as much as possible.

  • Anticipate what your Opponent might play. Keep spells in hand that can address that.

  • Harsh Scrutiny can be used to smooth out your draw, even if the Opponent has no cards in hand. Sometimes that is necessary.

  • Use Glimmer of Genius only on your Opponent's end step, or to dig for a possible answer to one of their plays.

  • Cast Torrential Gearhulk only on your Opponent's Turn, on their Combat step, or in response to a spell they have cast. No matter how tempting it may be to cast it earlier, you need to use it to cast an Instant that nerfs your Opponent, and/or as a blocker.

  • Try to only cast Tezzeret the Schemer when you have a Creature to protect him, and a spell to stop your Opponent from getting rid of him right away. The second point is not as important if you have recently looked at your Opponent's hand, and have seen that they have nothing that can remove him.

Why Tezzeret the Schemer is so good

I always like using Planeswalkers in Control decks, as it is so easy to protect and ultimate them.

Here's what Tezzeret the Schemer brings to the table:

NOTE: This is the rare occasion where you SHOULDN'T activate your Planeswalker's Ultimate as soon as you can, unless you have another one in hand. Tezzeret's Emblem works best when paired with his +1.



Lands produce slightly more than , as that is what is needed in the early game.

Fetid Pools for colour fixing, or draw.

Field of Ruin lets you destroy any of the Legendary Lands, especially Azcanta, the Sunken Ruin  Flip, which can help your Opponent to draw.

Ifnir Deadlands don't slow the early game down, and can assist with nerfing or killing Creatures in the late game. Useful against Hazoret the Pervert.

Disallow - excellent for stopping the trigger on Approach of the Second Sun, or for Countering the first copy.

Fatal Push - simply the best hate card in Standard at the moment. Gets rid of mana dorks that help Dino decks, and early #1 Ramunap Red beaters.

Negate - an extra Counter spell for problematic non-Creature spells, or the mirror match.

Vizier of Many Faces - good against Hexproof Creatures such as Bristling Hydra or Carnage Tyrant. This is where the made by Glimmer of Genius can come in handy for activating the ability on Bristling Hydra.

Vraska's Contempt - is so versatile. Get rid of any Creature or Planeswalker. At Instant speed. Plus get 2 life. Ridiculous.

Walk the Plank - just a simple little spell against decks with a lot of small Creatures.


I'm happy with the tests for this, and have now started to buy the physical cards.

I think it will be ready to play in this Thursday's Standard Showdown.

Grabbed myself foil copies of Tezzeret the Schemer, as they will look fierce.

Comments View Archive

Antwaan33 says... #1

wouldnt duress be better as a sideboard card? , id like to see disallow in main.

October 15, 2017 3:03 p.m.

Very detailed description and great deck. Plus, Tezzeret is awesome. +1

October 15, 2017 3:11 p.m.

Argy says... #3

Antwaan33 everyone always wants me to put Disallow in the Mainboard, but I know my local meta and it's better in the Side.

Cthu1uS4uru5R3x thanks for the kind words.

I do spend a lot of time putting my Descriptions together. It's nice to see someone who appreciates that.

It's also great to meet a fellow Tezzeret fan. I feel that he is very underrated, especially in Standard.

His artwork is amazing.

October 16, 2017 6:18 a.m.

I always enjoy and appreciate the thoroughness of your builds and descriptions. This is a beaut.

Awesomeness. +1

October 16, 2017 10:11 p.m.

Argy says... #5

Thanks for the kind words, Jimmy_Chinchila

October 16, 2017 11:10 p.m.

PickleNutz says... #6

This is super similar to a deck that I have ran, its so weird how effective it is with just a few large creatures and absurd amounts of removal and counterspells. The current standard trend is packed with removal and its the only way to really counter that. +1

October 18, 2017 8:22 p.m.

Argy says... #7

That's pretty much how Control decks always work.

Lots of cards to disrupt the Opponent's plans, then play your Win Cons late game, when they run out of cards.

October 19, 2017 6:28 a.m.

Please login to comment

Compare to inventory
Date added 1 week
Last updated 3 days

This deck is Standard legal.

Cards 61
Avg. CMC 2.89
Tokens Tezzeret, Etherium Cell
Folders 2. Ixalan, Standard, nice, control, Control, Interesting Decks, Other people's standard, copy deck, Ixalan
Top rank #1 on 2017-10-16
Views 4159

Revision 6 (3 days ago)

-3 Tezzeret the Schemer main
+3 Tezzeret the Schemer main

See all